I think I spend quite a good amount of time thinking about my current situation. Wether it be possitive or negative thoughts, pruductive or destructive, rational or irrational; it has become possibly a hindrance to me being the person I want to be. I've always held the Ability to be introspective with such high esteem, but I wonder now if I am wasting away by spending so much time thinking about how badly I don't want to waste away.  These are my idle hands. I wonder if this would suggest that too much introspection can be a bad thing? I wonder if I had the ability to be less self-aware, if I would grow to be more the person I want to be: creative, spiritually adept while at the same time deeply sincere, frugal, pro-active, carding, humble, I could go on and on. And to able to be that person with an energy and passion that would inspire. So how do I do that? How do I become less self aware? How do I spend less time thinking about what I want to be, to allow more time to be who I want to be? And why the hell have I spent most of my 20's doing this? I would love to give it such a noble name as self discovery, but in all honesty would probably have to give a name more like internal people watching.